it's been a while

ok, I guess I kind of abandoned the internet there for a bit. fellow bloggers have already settled in to 2013 with optimism and productivity, while I feel like I slept through most of january.

in my defence, the month went by too fast. I didn't get my usual dose of bitter-sweet nostalgia and catharsis. so this is going to be the start of my new year.

it's impossible to write anything regarding new year's celebrations without getting that Death Cab song stuck in your head. that is one thing that has not changed since, oh, around 2006. I think that's comforting?

either way... so this is the new year!

I had a look over my last new year's post- which also was of course incredibly late because punctuality is never a resolution of mine- and I realized, sadly, that I didn't do a single one of my resolutions from last year.

I'm not particularly upset about that, but it does perpetuate the theme of 2012 being pretty much the worst year ever.

I've been trying to catch up on my blog reading (which is coming a long very slowly, man, you guys are interesting!) and it seems like 2012 was much kinder to most of you. or maybe you're just less bitter and jaded, haha. I have to say, while last year had its highlights, overall it kinda sucked.

I choose to see this as motivating.

I won't get into all the reasons why last year was terrible. that's pointless and sad. I will say that while last year at this time I was hopeful, confident, and excited, I'm starting 2013 with no job prospects, a complicated family life, and an intense sense of failure.

again, I choose to see this as motivating.

so for 2013 my goals are very different. they're less about fun, trivial pursuits, and more about general life improvement. and finding joy in the midst of a stressful time.

in no particular order, this year I want to...

- travel again. I keep seeing other people's travel pictures on pinterest, and my feet are starting to itch again. I cannot express how badly I want to go everywhere. I didn't get to a new continent in 2012, so this year I'm going to make a more realistic goal; just travel. find a way to go to a new place. whether that's British Columbia or regular Columbia, just get there.

- have the ideal Newfie summer. or spring. if I plan on moving away again in the coming year, before I do I want to squeeze as much awesomeness out of Newfoundland as I can. I want to take a haunted hike, go camping in Gros Morne, see an ice berg up close, go whale watching, see local dinner theatre. Newfoundland is great. I will have concrete, photographic proof of that.

- be better at blogging. I really want to be more consistent with this blog. but not consistent to the point of mundane. I mean that I don't take, you know, month-long breaks without notice or reason. I need something constant in my life to make me feel a slight sense of accomplishment, or at least productivity. and who knows, maybe I actually will accomplish something on this thing.
- read at least one book a month. this is one from last year that I failed miserably. if I want to figure out how to go back to being a real person, I need to spend less time watching reruns of Friends and more time actually using my brain. and with all the internet time I bank, lets be honest, my brain needs a little exercise. watching Jeopardy! might not be cutting it anymore.

- re-learn guitar. know what happens when you neglect to practice an instrument you didn't learn till you were 21? you forget how to play it at all. which is especially frustrating when you consider how many hours it took me to perfect my inconsistent version of "Blackbird".

- move to nyc. I don't care when, I don't care how, I don't even care why. I've wanted to do this since I was 16, and now, at 25, it seems miraculously within reach. I'm done dreaming about it; next year I wanna be writing my extraordinarily late new year's post from my shoddy/hipster Brooklyn apartment.


except, not die. really hopefully not.

and there you have it. my optimistic, yet realistically attainable, new year's resolutions.
so I guess, happy january you guys. let's make 2013 our bitch.

(pardon my french. ooh! french! I should re-learn french, too...)